What Matters


I am impressed by knowledge and the knowledgeable.  One subject is sufficient for me.  No jack of all trades are necessary, I’ll be fine with a master of one.

The ability to break things down and make them understandable is greatly underestimated.  Find one who can make the hard things easy and though you will always know difficulty with this person it will all be easier.

I love a good smile and a clever laugh.  The great thing about laughter is that everyone laughs differently.  We all make little noises – some louder than others – and when we can make someone laugh so hard that they cannot stop our hearts come together as one.

A smile is a reflection of good feeling.  Someone’s smile shows us that we have made them think of something and that that something has made them feel good inside.  It matters not what it is they have thought about only that we have brought about this positive emotion in them.

The way of the mind is just as important as the density of information contained therein.  A rough mind can fill you with information but a gentle mind can weave the intricacies of any problem coolly through our veins.

Most of us desire a kind heart but a heart filled with wisdom can beat just as well as one filled with empathy.  Adaptation and the ability to adjust to the thoughts, ideas, and feelings of others matter just as much as the way of the heart.  As long as the heart is pointed in the right direction you will get it right most of the time but it is only when our hearts come together through understanding that we move together in step with one another.

It is – perhaps more than anything else – important to find someone who understands our priorities as much as our feelings, our ideas, and our dreams.  Those who lack priorities also lack a clear understanding of their dreams for priorities are necessary for dreams to come true.

I like someone who isn’t afraid to touch.  Not in a naughty way – although that too has its place – nay sometimes we need the comfort of the human touch and the feelings of the person behind it to be expressed because we lack the emotional ability to bring these feelings out of ourselves.

I’ll always enjoy the scent of those who put in the effort to smell their best.  There’s no need to overdo it.  The smell of someone who has put as much thought into how they smell as they have into how they look can be as attractive as any physical attribute one may have.

I enjoy a good conversation with a good conversationalist.  Someone who knows when to fill in the silence with the right words or who knows when to leave the silence can make all the difference in the world.

Flexibility over stubbornness will always win you points in my book.  Being stubborn still holds some value.  I can think of no one who is a better advocate for me – even when I’m wrong – than my stubborn friends.  Flexibility however allows you to see all sides and fortune favors though who have the ability to see past certain issues and around the normal roadblocks.

I value strong communication skills.  The ability to communicate well and effectively is not measured by your ability to get your point across but by your ability to listen and adapt to the thoughts and ideas of others as well.  Those who do not listen can never learn just as those who do not speak cannot be heard.

Sometimes gentle words and a massive hug can eliminate all the pain that we feel even if it is just for an instant.  Those who seek to heal us deserve our time and our love.  Those who seek immediate solutions should be avoided.  Nothing worth doing is easy nor does it have a quick or easy solution.

I value those who see me cry and know that it is best to back off and give me space.  We do not need to be constantly comforted by those who feel bad about the way we are feeling.  Oftentimes we simply need the space to let the pain run its course and for us to understand what we’re going through.

Manners are important in all situations.  Do not do something in the company of others that you would not do in the company of your mother.

Fairness matters but only in the abstract and only when it comes to the biggest issues we face in life.  When we view one thing as an absolute we cheat others out of their due relative to what was expected of them.

What we think only matters if we say it out loud.  There is great wisdom in speaking only when it improves the silence but there are lost opportunities in this as well.  Your opinion matters.  Your opinion does not matter always however.

Someone who is secure with who they are is important but someone who understands that true wisdom comes from our willingness to change is indispensable.
Those who seek to understand us should be treasured.  Those who take the time to know us must be appreciated.  Those who want to love us must always be given a chance.

Graciousness is the most misunderstood virtue out there.  Those who seek to use you will twist this to their advantage and abuse your trust.  Those who deserve our graciousness will often feel as though it were a trap.

I value understanding above all but flexible understanding will go even further with me.  Many people can understand a problem, some care enough to think about it, but only a select few will care enough to help you solve your problem.  Hang on to the ones who listen, hang on to the ones who think, but never let go of those who help you for they are the ones who can change your life.


One thought on “What Matters

  1. I think we neglect a lot of things when we care about someone. It’s important that you realize what matters to you otherwise you may find that it is gone!

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